No-one has the "perfect" life. All of us have a multitude of challenges and problems to deal with on a daily basis. But if some of these problems become so overwhelming that they affect your mental health, you need to start looking at ways to fix them.

Is there something going on in your life that is making you frustrated, stressed or sad? Are you finding it hard to enjoy your life because this one thing is becoming all-consuming?

Perhaps you are unemployed and are finding it impossible to get work. Maybe you are lonely and desperate for companionship. Are you having relationship difficulties?

Don't let your problem fester and take control of your life. You have a choice: you can do nothing and wait to see what happens, or you can do something.

I want you to have a look at this simple sentence:
"If you don't like something about your life, make plans to change it".

Burn this phrase into your brain. Write it down. Invoke it whenever you encounter hard times. Note that it doesn't say "change it" but "make plans to change it". Sometimes it's not that simple to change things quickly, but there is always something you can do to get the ball rolling.

For example, if you can't find a job, you could change some of your strategies, start your own business, or get a new qualification. If you want a partner, get out more, actively seek out new friends, join a club or dating service. If you are having relationship issues, sit down and talk things through, ask yourself what specific things you could do to make it better, seek professional guidance.

Sometimes the things that make you unhappy are out of your control. Maybe you can't change the event, but you can change how you feel about it. 

It pays to put things into perspective. Ask yourself how important the issue is in the big scheme of things. Look for any positives that may arise out of the gloom, even if it's only learning from your mistakes.

Try to keep your thoughts rational and maintain an optimistic mindset. Instead of thinking "This event has ruined my life", think "This bad thing has happened, but if I do this, this and this, I can make things better". Pessimism tends to lead to inaction. Optimism tends to lead to taking positive steps forward.

Remember that you are in charge of your life, and you have the power to change it.

If you live in Auckland, and would like to find out about personal coaching, visit www.eclipselifecoaching.com or call Kris on (09) 629 6080.
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