Confident people are like a magnet to others. They are at ease with themselves, driven, successful and happy. They are not constrained by constant fear and doubt, and are willing to take risks to achieve what they want in life. Here are some simple ways you can give your confidence a boost:

Fake it ‘til you make it

Pretend to be super-confident even if you don't really feel it. Choose an event or situation that's coming up soon, and decide that you will become an alter-ego of yourself, just like an actor does. It doesn't matter if it doesn't feel "real" at first; just have fun with it. This can be an incredibly liberating experience, and you may find you enjoy it so much that you start to make it a habit. Pretty soon, as you do this more and more, it will seem natural, and just a part of who you are.

Write down your past achievements

Sometimes you can descend into a downward spiral of negative thinking, and forget about all the great things you have done in the past. This kind of mindset inhibits your ability to take positive action. Take the time to write down 10 things that you are proud of achieving in your life up to this point. Doing this will force you to think about what you have already accomplished, and make you realise that you can do it again.

Look good, feel good

Our outer appearance is a reflection of our confidence. How confident do you think you would act and feel if you slouch all the time, look at the ground, mumble, and dress like a homeless person? Make the effort to stand tall, to look people in the eye, speak clearly and take pride in your physical appearance.

Visualise

Let's say you have been invited to friend's party and are anxious about socialising with others. Instead of thinking about everything that could go wrong, imagine things going well. Visualise how you are actively engaging with strangers, laughing, smiling and generally having a great time. Embedding these positive images in your mind puts you in a better mood, and you will naturally feel more confident.

You don't have to be loud, brash or over-bearing to appear confident. It all comes from believing in yourself and your abilities, and being comfortable with who you are.

If you live in Auckland, and would like to find out about personal coaching, visit www.eclipselifecoaching.com or call Kris on (09) 629 6080.

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